Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
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