Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
