Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Randomize
