i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
