do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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