all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
