I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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