I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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