I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
