Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize