I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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