Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
