youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
