I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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