so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Randomize
