If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
