Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Everyone says I win the strip club
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
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