i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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