I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
