There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
