You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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