he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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