Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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