Whatcha textin bout Willis?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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