I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize