his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
