I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Mom said you looked used
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
