yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
