She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
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