Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
