beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Randomize