Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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