He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize