Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
