Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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