i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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