i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
