i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
