He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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