you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
