I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
