i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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