Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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