she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
