We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize