That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize