i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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