Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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