Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
