I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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